How High School and College Teachers See Incoming Homeschoolers

Recently I have run across several articles discussing how prepared, and not prepared, homeschool kids are to enter the high school or college learning scene.  This got me curious, so I talked to a few teachers as well as homeschool students who have made the transition from home to the classroom.

Here are the major ideas I have collected, some desirable and some not so much.

Here are some of the common traits found in homeschoolers that are great for an awesome transition into college or high school.

·      Homeschoolers are eager learners.  They are curious, ask questions and dive in to the work well.  

·      They are often much more social and open to making new friends than their traditionally schooled counterparts. 

·      They easily interact with adults, including making eye contact and holding intellectual conversations.

·      Homeschooled kids tend to be great at budgeting their own time and figuring out new resources for information.

Yet with the benefits there are also some areas where they could improve.  These traits I found interesting, yet not totally surprising. 

·      Homeschoolers tend not to be great test takers, especially in timed situations.  Frankly, many of us homeschooling parents find this a pro and urge our kids to learn not for the tests.  Their more classically trained counterparts are highly trained at excelling in this arena.  (Yes, there is so much more that can be said here including about how much this skill is needed in the real world, etc.)  If your kids are going to go the college route, giving them some training here is essential starting as early as middle school.

·      Deadlines.  Homeschoolers are weak at meeting deadlines.  This skill does transfer into life and work adult needs.  Practice giving them hard deadlines in a variety of different situations.  These areas could include reading a book, a big project, and science experiments, to job and internship tasks.  Have them get into situations where others are giving them deadlines and teach them how to work out a schedule on how to meet them successfully.

·      Homeschoolers tend to be weak in the sciences and math areas.  For many this is not a serious issue, but if your child wants to pursue a major in college in one of these areas, beefing up their studies may be very important.  Almost all of the teachers, as well as students I talked to, mention that this was an issue for them.  Start outsourcing classes slowly.  In our area, our community colleges take high school age homeschoolers early.  They then have access to deadlines, test, upper level math and sciences at a slower pace. 

·      Socialization.  This is not what I expected but it totally makes sense.  Our fabulous homeschool kids are a little too comfortable talking with the teachers.  Often these kids find they are drawn to the teachers and not the students as peers.  This, I think is a “quality problem” and not one to fix as much as recognize and mention to your child to be aware of.  Several teachers, especially the high school teachers, did almost find it a problem.  My daughter mentioned many of her college professors liked that about her and her fellow homeschooled students, though several were not OK with the familiarity.  Teaching homeschooled kids when it is and is not appropriate is likely the key here.

The most important thing we as parents can learn from this is that we really need to look at the end goal.  Is college really the best fit?  If so, could it be in an area that needs heavy math or science knowledge?  How can we take the ideas mentioned above and use them to prepare our kids in these areas? Leave your comments and let’s start a deep, insightful conversation.

35 Little Things that Would Mean a Lot to Your Kids- Homeschool Version!

Recently in Parents magazine, there was an article called 30 Little Things that Would Mean a Lot to Your Kids.  It was an awesome article!  Maybe some of you saw the link I shared in our group.  It was definitely aimed towards families who have kids in school.  I thought it would be fun to create one for homeschoolers.  Be sure to add your ideas in the comments section below.

Here we go!

1. Next time your kids want to stay in pajamas all day, let them.
2. Serve their favorite dessert before dinner.
3. Take a surprise day off of school and do their favorite activity.
4. Skip a page in their curriculum that made them groan.
5. Switch their reading time book with something they will love instead of what is required.
6. Spend some alone time with each kid, one-on-one and just listen to him or her.
7. Have a spontaneous board game night or afternoon.
8. Hide little notes in their curriculum or dresser drawers.
9. Break a rule.  Nothing big, just something that doesn’t matter that much to show them that it is OK to think outside the box sometimes.
10. Take a day off from chores.
11. Have a superhero school day and show up in a cape.
12. Next time they argue with you about something, ask them why it matters to them, really listen, and try to help them discover a compromise.
13. When they come to you with that crazy idea to start a business or build a fort that you would usually shoot down because of time, help them with it.
14. Take a surprise detour on the way home to an ice cream shop, toy store, or park.
15. Turn on some loud music and have a dance party in the middle of the day.
16. Thank your kids for every little thing, even washing their hands and finishing a page of work.
17. Take a surprise vacation.  Pack while they are asleep and leave when they wake up!
18. Hold an awards ceremony for something they are proud of.
19. Find a new park and plan to meet a friend there.
20. Wear their handmade necklace to the grocery store.
21. Have a nag free day.
22. If there is something your child really hates, even after trying their best, let them quit.
23. Create a school mascot, theme song, and handshake.
24. Get that puppy they wanted, or other pet that needs a child’s love.
25. Have a theme day, like Pirate Day with costumes, special food, decorations, ending in a movie or maybe a color day where all clothes, food, etc. are all one color.
26. Stay up late to see the full moon or get early and watch the sunrise.
27. Start a pillow fight! (Love this one!)
28. Have a gratitude day for each member of the family.  Spending the day having everyone tell that person why you are grateful for them.
29. Skype or FaceTime a faraway family member or homeschool convention friend.
30. When your child has a passion about something, find a pro to go and visit.  Imagine your child’s face when talking to a professional race car driver or ballerina!
31. End school early and have a movie day, with popcorn and everything.
32. Have your kids help create fun family rituals, like game night, taco day, or telling jokes at the dinner table on Fridays.
33. Put paper mailboxes on everyone’s bedroom door and send loving messages.
34. Bake a birthday cake just because.
35. Make a huge fort with the couch cushions and sheets before your child gets out of bed in the morning.

Making those amazing childhood memories is what this is all about.  Share what you try in the Facebook group, Homeschool with Confidence.  I can’t wait to hear all about it!

How to Really Challenge Your Kids for Growth

One of the difficulties (and benefits) we find as parents of homeschoolers is that we are in charge of finding ways for our children to grow.  I am talking about the kind of growth that we as the main adult in their lives can’t really provide.  Kids, well all people actually, model the people they are around the most.  I know for me one of the difficulties I have is that I hate math.  I focus really hard on not letting that affect my kids, but I know I am not the best person to teach them that subject.  With that in mind, we have found several people over the years that LOVE math.  These are the people I really want my kids to study with!

 What does excellence look like?
Now I want to take this idea to a higher level.  I am going to start with a story.  My middle daughter was a competitive figure skater for many years.  When she started, she wanted to skate like the older kids at this little beginner school near our house.  One thing I noticed was she could only progress to the top of that school.  As she gained more and more skill, she out grew that school and quickly needed more.  We switched rinks, found a coach, and she had a new, higher level to strive for.  A year or two passed, she started to compete, and had a new level of “top” to work towards.  As she reached that top level, we found we needed to switch things up again.  Her new coaches started to have her travel to competitions.  Something they said stuck with me and I still apply it regularly to our lives.  They told us that to be an excellent figure skater, she needed to see lots of different excellent skaters so she can see what excellent really looks like.

Think about it. 
When you are learning to do something, you set an expectation of how well something is supposed to be done.  You can only strive for the top of the example you are shown.  Imagine in figure skating competing with everyone from your rink versus competing with the best in the country.  After time, you could win the competition at your rink easily because you know what is expected, you practice at the level the other kids are skating at, but there isn’t the challenge or stretch there could be.  In comparison, imagine the practice time before a national competition.  Seeing all of the other skaters, with their varied developed skills, now raises the bar.  It creates a new standard-a new base line.  It pushes you to be the best you can be in all areas.  Another analogy could be tennis.  Think of playing two games of tennis.  One is with your buddy and you two are pretty evenly matched.  The other is with a high level player and he really challenges you.  Which game would instigate more growth in you as a player?

Success leaves clues. 
Often our kids have a talent or love for something that is not our strong suit.  I know for me that at a certain point I needed to find someone else who loved and knew things about math that I could not provide.  I was able to find a tutor for them.  There are many ways to provide an outside mentor to ensure a higher-level viewpoint.  There are always teachers and coaches, but be sure to get ones who really know and love their subject.  Your kids can skip years of trial and error learning by being taught by the best. 

Reading autobiographies and biographies allows your kids to experience how successful people think.  It is those thoughts that help them truly excel.  How we think about things often helps us grow much more than what we think about.  Another option for mentors is to mentally go through your family, friends, neighbors, etc. and figure out who has special skills or interests that might be willing to talk to or work with your kids.  To have them really be challenged, actively seek out the best in the topic your child is interested in and have your child contact them.  If they are local, maybe your kid could intern with them, volunteer, or spend a day shadowing them.  If they are not local, have your child email or snail mail them with questions.  I have found many successful adults love kids who are interested in what they are doing.

As I mentioned above, success leaves clues.  Set your kids on a hunt for the traits of successful people.  It will really speed up learning and growth.

What I Did to Turn My Homeschool Around

In the beginning days of our homeschooling journey, I had so many questions. I was frustrated when things didn’t work out the way I wanted them to. We never seemed to complete the assigned curriculum work because we seemed to always get lost on a tangent. On top of that, after all of the time I spent researching, as well as all of the money I spent, the curriculum wasn’t really teaching things the kids needed! Those early days were frustrating sometimes!

That is when I knew we needed to do something drastically different. First, we sat down and had a long discussion about why we decided to homeschool in the first place. That discussion showed us that we were really just replacing school in the home. That wasn’t what we were trying to do at all! We choose this journey because we wanted to give something more to our kids. We didn’t want them bogged down by a preplanned curriculum that didn’t match their interests, needs, or skill level. We wanted them to be excited about learning, to pick up a book because they were curious, and learn things they would help them to be better adults.

This one thing- this one planning session- changed things completely for us. We knew that this is what the journey was about for us and we needed to always be focused on these ideas. 

In the years that followed, whenever we felt off track, or one of us started dreading our days, we went back to the vision of why we were doing this. It was amazing at how quickly our days shifted back into ones we loved. 

This journey isn’t about the next cool piece of curriculum you see your friend trying or activity you’ve downloaded from Pinterest. It is about what you are ultimately trying to provide your kids.

I have created a program to help parents build the kind of homeschool they want and love for their family. It is called Homeschool with Confidence. I would love for you to check it out. Here is a video I created talking about it. 

In this video Juli Gauthier, a veteran homeschool mom, reviews the 6 modules that make up her online course for parents who are new to homeschooling and for those experienced moms who need grounding in what's truly important to them.

If you want to explore it more, you can check it out HERE.

It is my goal to share all of the things I have figured out over the years so that the up and coming homeschool families can by-pass some of the years of trial and error.  I hope you find sweet spot for you and your kids.  It is an amazing place to be!

Homeschooling- Can I Even Do This?

I’m sure that as a homeschool parent you sometimes feel overwhelmed with what you have taken on – total responsibility for your kids’ formal education. Knowing that others have been there and have navigated successfully through it can be an important source of comfort and inspiration as you “figure it all out.”

As my youngest graduates 15 years of homeschooling and takes his place as a happy, healthy young adult well equipped to “take on the world,” I share with you our own personal homeschooling story.  May it be an inspiration to you and your family.

I remember that before we even started to think about homeschooling, my oldest daughter came home from first grade talking about how her best friend started to homeschool and she wanted to also.  It seems like yesterday that we were going over to his house to see what they were really doing.  The whole concept seemed alien to me.  How could I possibly provide everything a group of teachers and a whole school community provided???  

Fast forward several years to my next child.  At 9, she approached me with a book about homeschooling and told me to buy it because she was just going to do it.  I bought it.  I read and thought about it.  My husband and I discussed it.  A lot.  We were still not sure.  Could we possibly handle all of the opportunities the highly trained professionals could offer our kids?  

It is funny how all of these things work out.  We definitely were sent a message.  A series of things kept happening showing us the path to homeschooling was one we should try.  The last straw was when our 9 year old’s shoulder was dislocated at 10am and they did not call either one of us or an ambulance.  They let her cry with ice packs all day.  Her arm was blue when I picked her up from school that day.  She almost lost her arm.

Because of this, something in my mind shifted.  Maybe the teachers don’t know it all.  Maybe we could do this.  Maybe we needed to do this.  We decided she should finish the year as it was just a couple more weeks, but then we pulled her out of school.  The rest of the kids quickly followed her home.  This was the beginning of the most rewarding 15-year journey of my life!

I researched everything I could find on homeschooling.  It wasn’t nearly as difficult as I feared it would be!  We started with deschooling, one month of free time for every year in school while the other kids are in school.  It was like magic.  Sibling rivalry ended (for the most part).  Our kids read without being asked.  Curiosity became a daily occurrence. The best part was that our family was closer and happier than ever AND our kids were learning much more than they had been in school.  We hadn’t even really started yet!

What were the key things that worked for us?  I do believe the deschooling made a huge difference.  The kids rediscovered how to learn for the joy of learning again.  That was amazing to watch!  Looking back, I think one of the most important things I did, was to shift my mindset that this was my priority now.  I wasn’t distracted when working with them.  This was my job, my purpose, my mission.  I was open to what they wanted/needed and I listened a lot.  Finally, we made a homeschooling mission statement for our family.  I got the idea from Stephen Covey’s Seven Habits of a Highly Effective Family.  My husband and I decided that “Love to Learn, Love to Read, and Become Happy, Healthy, Contributing, Functioning Adults” covered the bases for us.  If we missed something, the loving to learn and read would provide them with the tools to figure it out.  So far it has worked!  We have 3 happy, healthy, contributing, functioning adults making their mark on the world.  I am more than grateful for this journey of homeschooling!  Yes we could and we did and you can do it, too!